inspiration – Feminine Finishing School

Deciding to grow into your true femininity as a woman means choosing to become the best version of yourself. This is never a finished process but rather a life-long journey. We can always learn and improve more. Femininity is not merely a fashion style or a personality type; it’s something that runs deep in the character of what it means to be female. This doesn’t mean it necessarily comes naturally to be feminine all the time. We must overcome our selfish, lazy, greedy instincts as humans in order to tap into our higher true potential of who we were made to be. I have previously identified what I think three core traits of femininity are. The first of these is nurture – but how can we become more nurturing as women? Femininity is inseparable from nurturing because that’s what motherhood, family, friends, community, hospitality, and homemaking are all about.

Loving Hearts

To become nurturing we must first have loving hearts. We should let our hearts be soft to feel compassion and empathy for others, especially those who are more vulnerable than us. This may mean we particularly feel for children, animals, the poor, the oppressed, or people undergoing difficult circumstances or mental health struggles. We should practice putting ourselves in other people’s shoes, remembering that everyone has their own backstory and fears. I think gentleness is something we can cultivate and we can learn to find something to love in everyone around us. Once we position our heart from a place of love, that compassion will naturally begin to overflow in our everyday actions. Having a loving heart means genuinely caring for the people around us, helping them feel safe in our presence, and seeking out ways to nurture those in need.

Protective Boundaries

Having a loving heart doesn’t mean we let people take advantage of us. A loving heart must be kept safe by protective boundaries or we are of no use to anyone. We need to be able to judge and discern both people and situations so that we can continue to nurture those that matter most. Our safety comes first and we mustn’t let it be compromised. If you sense a dangerous situation, get out of there. Nurturing also means nurturing ourselves so, even if it’s not potentially harmful and they’re all good things to do, sometimes we will have to prioritise what is most important to us and say no to things. Femininity is about being strong in our gentleness, and so a gentle heart must have strong boundaries. Be kind always, but don’t let your kindness get taken advantage of or manipulated. It’s not your responsibility to help everyone. You’re not the saviour of the world. Nurture those you can, then pray for other people to reach those you can’t.

Encouraging Spirits

When you have a loving heart and protective boundaries in place, let your nurturing power touch others’ lives by communicating with an encouraging spirit. Words are impactful. They can make someone’s day or devastate them. Words last longer than just the time it takes for you to speak them, so be intentional and make sure that yours build people up. Encourage the people in your life. Lift them up, inspire them, show them who you see they could be, and support them in growing into their beautiful potential. Encouragement is in actions as well as words. Make sure that your energy and presence helps bring out the best in those around you. Reinforce positive behaviour by acknowledging it. If you have a close enough relationship that the other person feels safe with you, then hold them accountable as well and let them know you believe they can be better. Nurturing is about helping life to grow, flourish, and thrive. Try to leave everyone a little better than you found them. That is the true power of feminine nurture.

Learn More

Femininity at its best is a warm, creative, nurturing energy that seeks to help life flourish. As we grow towards becoming more feminine, we want to radiate joy and express an inner peace founded on wisdom that has become almost intuitive, we dwell in it so much. I think that as we practice habits that help us become better people and more feminine women, we should find ourselves gradually beginning to flow more from a place of love in our everyday lives. At the core of femininity is perhaps a love of life itself in all its beautiful diversity and a love for all the living. It’s because we recognise the inherent value of creation that we strive to help it thrive.

Nurturing, nourishing, creating, beautifying, guiding, and sharing wisdom are all life-giving acts. We each express our femininity in individual ways – some women may be more whimsical artists or gentle souls, whilst others may be bold campaigners or encouraging leaders. All of these are life-giving. In a flourishing garden there is much variety and beauty. It is only where things are dead that everything is the same, or in a blank monoculture that doesn’t support other forms of life. I think one key to maintaining and motivating our femininity is to revel in, be awed by, and celebrate life. Celebrations draw communities, families, friends, and relationships together. They unite people and provide an opportunity to nurture one another, as well as giving a means to express creativity and grow traditions that can point to a greater wisdom.

Femininity needs to celebrate life because celebration fosters appreciation for creativity, community, and the gift of living. One form of celebration is music. I find that music can be helpful for tuning into an energy and mode of being, so below I’ve shared several songs that I feel tap into different parts of femininity. You may have other pieces of music that express femininity to you, yet I hope these might form a source of inspiration. Know that you are loved and so can live from that place of love. God bless!